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It is interesting to consider. I think it is the extent of Rob’s narcissism that makes him different as well as his complete lack of empathy for other people. We have seen Lynda be very kind at times and not for her own glory.
I think the early Rob was hard to identify as an abuser simply because he was exhibiting behaviours that, let’s face it, we all do from time to time. We are all focused on ourselves a bit too much sometimes, we all do things to encourage people around us to act the way we would like sometimes. Or is that just me? Anyway its not the self I am proud of, or strive to be, but I acknowledge it has happened. I think the difference with early Rob, is that he didn’t acknowledge his poor behaviour and it was an unrelenting pattern. It was hard to identify a particular situation, early on in the Helen/Rob relationship, that you could point to and say “this is the problem”. The line between normal human faults and something more sinister is unclear, at least initially.
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